The Inspire blog

A few years ago, someone asked me a question. Without knowing anything about me, she said, “How will you make it to college?” Three years later, as I thrive in my senior year of college, I still ponder that question. At the time, I needed help with the process, so I reached out. Instead of support, I was seen as an imposter. She asked the question, then blocked me, no chance to explain, no chance to feel seen.

A few months ago, I found myself at Harvard, in rooms with some of the brightest minds in the country, in places I had never dreamed I would be. And yet, I felt like that same imposter again. What am I doing here? How and what and just… how?

Imposter syndrome stems from many things: past experiences, bullying, cultural dynamics, self-esteem, and even our notions of ourselves. I began to ask, Who exactly would I define Tomi as? Was this feeling rooted in my own thoughts, in how I saw myself, or in what others had told me? I realized I had built an image of myself based on the words of people who would never understand what it feels like to live in my shoes. People with their own battles and beliefs, probably different from mine.

People who were simply not me. I had silenced my own voice and, perhaps even more critically, I had silenced the voice of the ONE who truly mattered. I had silenced the voice I most needed to hear…not my own, but Jesus’, the one who knows me better than I know myself.

I cannot tell you how to overcome imposter syndrome on your own, because I didn’t. I don’t think I could have. But I can tell you that you need to filter out the noise from the outside.

Sometimes we ask ourselves, What was I made for? I’m sure Billie Eilish can relate. But the truth is, you cannot fully discover what you were made for without looking to the One who made you. When we begin to see ourselves in a different light…through the eyes of the One who created us…maybe we can start to understand how and why certain things happen. Maybe we can start to embrace our strengths, our weaknesses, and the truth that God doesn’t call the qualified; He qualifies the called.

I could tell you to believe in yourself and that you are capable of much more, but I guarantee you, it will never take the imposter syndrome away. The woman who questioned how I’d make it to college didn’t do so because I didn’t have the grades or wasn’t qualified. She asked because my situation seemed, at the time, entirely delusional.

Whenever you find yourself in places you feel you weren’t meant to be, sitting at tables where you don’t think you belong, remember this: you are worthy of God’s love and every blessing that comes with it because Jesus made it possible. It’s not about you anymore; it’s about something greater than you.